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Life has been anything but easy lately.  Not just my father-in-law’s health, but my own and how to manage my disease while being supportive of my husband as he navigates the unknown waters of post-surgery delirium.

This moment is the other shoe dropping.

Things happening in clusters – first a run of really good things and now a run of really challenging things.  Moments that remind me again and again how far I have to go on my journey of self-development and self-discovery.

How do you know the line that differentiates self-care from selfishness?  How do you give without giving up everything … your self-worth, your mental health, your personal peace?  I wonder these things as I sit in my headache purgatory.  As I order groceries online to be delivered.  As my legs buckle beneath me, giving up or giving in …. On the verge of giving out.

How do I walk this tight rope of personal preservation as my husband transitions to permanent care-taker?  Is it even possible?

This is the other shoe dropping.  Loudly.  With a definitive thud.

Xox, g

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