cog in the wheel

Some days are harder than other days.

Recently, I’ve had a string of bad days and it’s hard to recover from that.

Last night I said to John ~ “Sometimes, after a difficult day, or a grueling meeting, when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror I’m surprised that I’m not the ugliest hag of a troll with no brain whatsoever.  Because after spending too much time listening to how certain people talk to me, it’s hard to imagine NOT being the dumbest, ugliest, most clueless person ever.  Since that’s how I’m treated.”  And that can basically sum up a certain percentage of my days at work.

I think we all probably have days like that.  And then we come home, and make a comforting dinner, pour a restorative glass of wine, curl up to watch “Downton Abbey” … and for just a moment, things don’t seem so bad anymore.

And then the next day arrives with frightening speed.  And it just keeps happening … over, and over and over again.

It’s hard not to find some of one’s identity in the work we do, in the days spent with the same people ~ not, perhaps people that we would choose to socialize with, but people who make up the bigger picture of ‘work.’  And our self-confidence comes from that, from how well we do our jobs, from the feedback, from the way co-workers treat and interact with you.

But then there are those moments, when work has been challenging and long and exhausting, and you’re finally done, and sitting around with the group of people you’ve put all the blood sweat and tears in with … and there’s a camaraderie and an understanding.  And you know that even if you get annoyed or frustrated or just plain sick of these people, in the end, you all have each other’s back.  You’re friends on a different level, friends who all “get it.”  And that’s what makes all the other b.s. worth it.

 

 

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