I’ve been wondering lately what it is that I have to say exactly.  What is my contribution to the conversation?

Every time I *think* I know, life happens and it either irrevocably changes the conversation or renders my thoughts obsolete.  So I’m here, blogging every day (whoo hoo – it’s Day #80 of the new year and I’m still going!).  But I’m not sure what my point is or what I’m trying to say.

That I’m alive?  That I am doing this?  Last year I wanted to get to Day #66 because the idea of doing something for 66 days to create a habit has worked pretty well for me.  But I stopped blogging around the time I finished reading “Why Buddhism is True” and went back to yoga.  Once I was back in my routine of yoga, blogging got forgotten.  I got sidetracked by something else … Blogging became an afterthought.

The past two years have been strange and difficult and … uncomfortable.  If Covid had never happened, where would I be?  Would I be the same person – would my path have been the one I have walked these past few years? I wonder all those things, and I wonder often if I have anything at all to contribute to any larger conversation, or if I just like talking and the attention of  centering things around my story.

This year I have successfully gone to yoga and managed to blog and I even started my French lessons up again (something I was doing really regularly in 2019 and then … couldn’t manage to keep up when when we got home from Japan).  I began yoga teacher training again (what?!?).  I make dinner some nights.  Life has begun to get back to the hectic pace of “Before.”  I have eschewed rest for MORE STUFF.

Mostly it’s rooted in the idea that life is precious and I don’t want to waste a minute.  I want to pursue my passions and travel and kayak and learn how to paddle board and eat good food (and also lose weight because I was born last century and I am perpetually hung up on the scale and envy young women now who seep self-confidence out their pores).  I want to read books and talk about ideas and listen to live music and get eight hours of sleep and drink water and laugh and hold my husband’s hand.  And *also* have something relevant and thoughtful and provoking to say.

I want all the things.

Xox, g