Whether or not we all mean to, I think New Year brings out the contemplative in us all.  It’s a time of reflection of time passed, but also a new beginning ~ a time to look forward and try to make better, smarter and more authentic choices every day.

I’ve found that as I’ve gotten older ~ grown up shall we say? ~ my thoughts have wandered from semi-superficial (lose weight, watch less TV) to more cerebral.

The husby made an excellent point yesterday as we dined with my parents and toasted 2014.  Very matter-of-factly, he explained the pressure we have put on the past two years ~ 2012 is going to be the best year … 2013 is going to be the best year ever …. And guess what?  Neither 2012 or 2013 were the best years.  They just weren’t.

He and I have talked … endlessly, really … about making changes to enhance the quality of our lives.  Not so much a ‘New Year’s Resolution’ but more like making smarter choices.  LIfe brought a lot of changes for us this past year ~ there were highs and there were lows.  We got married, which was such an exciting, incredible and meaningful choice ~ and we spent the beginning part of 2013 very focused on making that happen.  I was also diagnosed with MS, broke my foot and have struggled through flares and three (count ’em!) medicines in less than 10 months.  Additionally, work has been a rollercoaster for both of us.  His company was bought, and my restaurant is finally opening our second location (!!!!).

But beyond that, when you are busy and stressed and trying to juggle endless balls in the air ~ sometimes (oftentimes?) you forget about yourself.  To eat well, to take care of yourself, to sleep, to nourish your soul.  That idea is at the root of our decision to begin making gradual changes in how we live.

I think our Christmas presents to each other are a perfect example.  Two large boxes sat wrapped beneath our tree leading up to Christmas Day.  We were spending the holiday at home, by ourselves, and for the first time since our first Christmas, we got each other gifts.  On Christmas morning, we each opened packages containing instruments ~ a guitar for him, a keyboard for me.  We’d begun to lose ourselves in adulthood ~ work, grocery shopping, family obligations…..  Outside interests, creativity ~ those things were forgotten, buried in the shuffle.

We had chosen ~ not long ago ~ that our future as a couple didn’t include starting a family and having children.   It wasn’t an easy discussion, and it wasn’t in any way an easy decision.  But now that it’s made, we are here, standing at the beginning of our married journey.  And making choices to life a fulfilled life is inherently important.

We’ve tried to recognize the things we are passionate about ~ music (and we cover the spectrum of styles!), travel, film and movies, food and wine.  Above most things, food.  Cooking it, learning about it, dining at restaurants where boundaries are pushed, and flavors are magnificent discoveries.  (Can I just mention that we ate a dish on Christmas Eve ~ sea urchin highlighted by soft scrambled eggs and cream …. man, I want to go have that again!) 

Thinking about these passions and how to live our lives so we can enjoy the things we love ~ that’s been a journey, as well.  So I have to say that I don’t have any true resolutions ~ I just want to be true to myself, to my soul, to my mind, to my values.  I want to take care of myself, and treat my body well.  And I want to remember who I am outside of work, who I am to my husband, my puppy, my family and friends.  And I hope that I can also stay true to myself in my decisions and choices.  I think that’s getting easier as I get older, because I think I know myself better and am more confident in who I am.

As Marilla once told Anne of Green Gables ~ “Tomorrow is a new day.  With no mistakes in it yet.”