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Back in August, before I fell off the map, the man and I took part in one of the coolest things I’ve done in awhile.

Diner En Blanc

We dressed in white, brought all our white accoutrement with us (yes, including tables and chairs and dishes and silverware and … well, you get the point) and enjoyed dinner al fresco with new friends in one of the coolest spots in Philly (to me ~ but I’m a sucker for the Ben Franklin Parkway …. and Logan Square situates you smack dab between the Philadelphia Art Museum and City Hall … gorgeous).

The restaurant generously catered for us, and we were lucky enough to have awesome dining neighbors, who shared smoked Cornish hen and lobster salad.  We shared some French sparkling rose’, so it almost equalled out (we were the big winners … the Cornish hen was ridic).

Had I had my shiznit together, I would have talked a lot about it … but I didn’t, and life has been trucking by, faster than I’ve been prepared for it.

Here’s the thing.  In July, both my mother and I (to a lesser degree) had huge health diagnosis’.  And even though I would like to be half the woman my mother is – she who soldiers on with a smile, great attitude and tons of energy to spare – I, woefully, fall far short.  It’s been tough ~ not necessarily due to my own health, but getting my brain securely around the truth about my mother’s health. Difficult, heart-breaking, scary, unknown, overwhelming, surreal … those are some of the words I can muster up in the moment.

So, a person definitely loses time when focused so singularly on something so utterly important.

On top of all that, football season started.  And football season came with baggage this year.  First, the baggage of what it means to be a Penn Stater.  Second, the baggage of living with a man whose team won the Super Bowl last year.  I totally understand that some people may read this and think … wait a second.  She is prioritizing football right up there with health issues.

No.  And yes.  No, nothing in my life is even close to being a priority like my mother. I am not going to wax lyrical, but seriously – if you have had a moment in your life like this, then you can understand the level of importance and also intensity.  Aka, unmatched. Buuuuut ….. Yes, football is a priority in my and the man’s life.  That’s who we are, that’s what we do … it’s a part of why our relationship works so well.  Mutual interests and understanding.

Additionally, Miss Lucy and I listened to part of a very interesting program on NPR a few weeks ago, and it cranked up the cogs in my brain.  Essentially (and I really wish I’d written this stuff down at the time) the program was focusing on social media, and society’s new ‘obsession’ (for lack of the correct word) with appearances.

What I mean by this is that instead of people working on who they are as people, inherently, on the inside …. we, as a society, are more concerned with how we appear to be.  Just stop and think about it for a minute.

Every picture, every status update, every blog post.  We present to the viewing virtual world the person we want to be ~ the person we want people to think we are.

Listening to the program made me stop dead and really examine what I do, and why I do it.  I had an internal battle.  “Well, of course I only share the good stuff … that’s what I’m supposed to do … focus on the positive, enjoy the good parts of my life, etc etc etc …” These were some of my thoughts.  Then I really began to mull it over… who did I want to be? What kind of impression does my writing leave of me … as a person?

Could I keep blogging?  Or was it all a charade?

Seriously.  I’m a huge overthinker.  But …. something about this line of thought really struck a chord with me.  Awhile ago, I got completely bent out of shape reading a generic criticism on twitter ~ but the criticism said pretty much what NPR said, just in a much snarkier way.

Hey, look at how great my life is ~ hey, look at the awesome things I cook ~ hey, look at my adorable dog/cat/hamster/child ~ hey, look at the cool places I go to with my super cool boyfriend/fiance/husband/soul mate ~ hey, check out my awesome perfect amazing everything  … blah blah blah.  Trust me, no one wants to see a status/tweet/instagram/blog post about the fact that I stepped in dog do-do this evening when I took Lucy out for a potty break.   It’s not cool or perfect or quirky or fun that my puppy has a sensitive digestive system and the man and I deal with her stinky ‘perfume’ and soft poos on a daily basis.  It’s slightly depressing and comes across as ‘please give me some sympathy’ if I posted pictures of my three-day IV line this summer when I had to inject myself with meds every afternoon.  But those are truths ~ those of part of my life.  And I would rather be vulnerable on here, but honest … instead of insincere and a projection of what I think I should be.

I want to always be working on who I am on the inside, who I am inherently (and trust me, there is a lot that could use some polishing … or to begin, some heavy sanding, because it could be a two (or more??) step process…).  I have a wicked temper, and I know that I don’t hide my emotions very well (I actually consciously think about this at work when I know my face looks like I-can-not-believe-you-are-saying-this-to-me and my whole body tenses … I am not proud of those moments). I also don’t want to blog because I need to ‘say’ something  … because I want to ‘project’ something about who I should/want to be or … crazy thought, am.  I want to blog the truth of my existence.

When I started this, I was learning to cook.  I’ve gotten okay in the intermittant months from them to now.  I truly enjoy being in the kitchen and preparing something for a group of people.  I think some of it boils down to what made me love the stage (quick recap, I have a degree in theatre).  I love the satisfaction of making something and receiving kudos because people enjoy it.  That’s not the most flattering thing about me ~ but it’s honest.  And I decided ~ when I opened up this blog and recommitted to it ~ that if I did nothing else, I was going to be myself.  You guys have seen that lovely quote “Better to be a first-rate version of yourself than a second-rate version of someone else.”  I think that includes a second-rate version of who you think you should be.

I am who I am who I am.  And I want to try my darnedest to stay true to that.

On a lighter note…

The man and I are super in love with green juice.  Jump on that band-wagon.  It’s the bomb-diggity.

We are taking our very first vacay together next week and I am so excited I can barely concentrate.  We are hopping on a plane to Jackson Hole, WY and there are so many things we want to do, I don’t know how we are going to fit it in, or what will make the cut.

What I’m sure of? A romantic dinner with the man at the Snake River Grill (the chef was a James Beard Award nominee, the menu and wine list are ridic, and I’m super duper psyched …. my wallet is not, but just this once, I am going to ignore her protestations!).  I don’t know that I am going to be very productive until then, but I will try!  Lucy and I have a half marathon we’re training for (okay, okay, I’m the only one running ~ but Lucy keeps me company!) and work is a crazy busy machine as we approach year end.

Ah.  Life.  She’s a corker.

recap

So, last week was a pretty crazy and fun week for the man and I ~ and it was only dampened by the fact that, true to form (I have silly bad luck), my nearly brand new MacBook Pro needed not only a new battery, but a new hard drive, at the tender age of 3 months.

So I wasn’t able to blog at all, which was a huge bummer.

Because …. !!!!

Not only did we have The Chef Event last Tuesday ~ which was a ton of fun, despite being completely underwater with the constantly pouring rain (no worries ~ it was held inside!) ~ but, it was the year anniversary of Ambler Symphony’s concert at Hope Lodge.  This year, the man was able to join me, and once again we brought some yummy cheese and charcuterie from the restaurant, and two bottles of really good wine (everyone make note ~ if you haven’t tried a rose yet ~ run to the liquor store and get Charles & Charles Syrah Rose from Washington State ~ you will not be sorry!).

On Thursday ~ and I know you’re not going to believe it ~ but we had our neighbors over for dinner, and I actually cooked.  No cheating involved ~ except for the taco seasoning! 😉

We had antelope burritos with cilantro sour cream and homemade guacamole.  In general, pretty successful, although I was a little bummed out that the sour cream didn’t reflect the cilantro flavor the way I wanted it to ~ I guess there’s always next time.

On Friday (yes, I know, we’re social butterflies! ~ haha) we spent the evening enjoying FriEndsDay (a twist on WeHangsDay when Wednesday’s don’t work out) ~ and excellent grilled Orange Ruffy with mango salsa, and sides of Israeli couscous and summer squash.  We even squeezed in a fire pit ~ niiiice!

Saturday was our first weekend at home in a few weeks, so we reverted to some of our favorite things ~ a long hike with Lucy in Valley Green, and then we headed into the restaurant to do some taste-testing of nightly specials (oh, go on, twist my arm!).  After dinner, we discovered a pretty amazing beer ‘haven’ a few blocks away ~ where our bartender proceeded to instruct me on a variety of brews, and hops in general.  So incredibly knowledgeable ~ I could have sat and learned all night, but I couldn’t keep drinking beer!

Sunday was a day for us ~ I was a little under the weather, and spent most of the day cuddled on the couch with my puppy, who was very accommodating and smelling deliciously of puppy.  Have you ever seen “Rise of the Planet of the Apes”?  If you haven’t, you should.  Really enjoyable piece of cinema.

And that brings us back to Monday.  Today was comfortingly ‘boring’ in it’s normalcy.  Lucy and I did four miles this morning, and this evening, the man and I grocery shopped and did a strength-training workout before sitting down to watch Master Chef .  Ah, suburban life!

Before I sign off and climb into bed ~ I just want to send a very Happy Birthday message out to Minda.  She’s a birthday diva like me, so I hope today was a great kickstart to her summer of freedom (#teacherenvy!).  Happiest of happy, my friend.

The Great Chef’s Event

This evening, despite the weather, the man and I are headed into the city for Alex’s Lemonade Stand & the Vetri Foundation’s huge fundraising event, The Great Chef’s Event.

If I had a functioning computer, I’d upload pictures tonight and tell you all about it.  But since I don’t, that’s where we will be ~ noshing on some seriously delish eats and hobnobbing with the best and the brightest in the NYC and Philadelphia restaurant business.  My goal is to meet Tom Colicchio ~ or Joe Bastianich (not 100% sure who will actually be in attendance!).  I think Joe was there two years ago (hazy memories) but since discovering MasterChef last year, I have become a huge fan.  He’s also pretty inspirational in regards to running and healthy eating/living.  It would be a big honor to get to shake his hand.

And when I do get my computer back, I’ll add pics!  I’m super excited, because it was amazing a few years ago.  I’m sure it’s just gotten bigger and better!

 

Boston

The man and I have safely arrived home from our whirlwind trip to Boston.  We spent the majority of yesterday and today in the car, and now, we’ve flopped on the couch to enjoy a few precious moments of ‘relaxation,’ and watching the Tonys.

Hope you’re staying cool and are also relaxing … staring tomorrow, it’s back to business as usual!

We loved Boston and can’t wait to go back … pics up soon!

4.

quattro. ceithir. cztery. vier. quatre. quattuor. It’s been a great adventure so far … <3

S’mores!

This afternoon, the man & I decided to make s’mores, because by the end of the night, everyone is too full & too tired (or, more accurately, much more interested in “iced tea” than gooey marshmallows, silky chocolate & crunchy Graham cracker).

The verdict is in & I am a fan of campfire s’mores. Prior to today, I had melted marshmallows as a kid in our family’s fireplace, and intermittently over firepits in suburban backyards. There is something to be said about a true campfire s’more. I am off to enjoy the delicious goodness. Happy Sunday!

Lucy’s First Camping Trip

I’m blogging from my phone today with very iffy service,so I will be short & sweet. We have been planning this camping weekend for quite some time – it is Lucy’s first (and only my second, so the man is dealing with uber novices).

We recently bought a new tent which we managed to set up in the dark so we could sleep last night (huge triumph). We realized this morning, however, that while our trial run last weekend of setting up the tent was very helpful, we’d managed to forget some crucial elements (an example ~ both sleeping bags!) We have managed to remedy most of the boo-boos, and the man is off getting more firewood as I tend the fire.

I would love to add pics but I can’t seem to upload them from my phone, so I promise to add at a later date. I hope you are enjoying Memorial Day Weekend as much as we are!

I DID IT!

Team green #runrunrun!  Broad Street Run 2012!

After one hour and fifty-eight minutes, my team and I crossed the finish line.

It wasn’t all easy!

We got to the finish line just before 7am to catch the subway to the start.  It was craziness how many people were EVERYWHERE!  The race kicked off at 8.30am, but we didn’t cross the start until 9.05a.  We set out at an easy pace (about eleven minutes/mile).  The first mile flew by.  The second (for me) was rough.  But that’s pretty typical for me during a run.  I knew once I got over the 2 mile hump, I would hit a groove.  The three mile marker came up pretty fast, and then you could clearly see City Hall and Ben Franklin looming in the distance.

It was completely bananas looking up and seeing the sea of people jogging ahead of us.  It was a whole lot of dry fit, lycra and neon trim!

Some friends of mine were at the seven mile-marker, and from seven to eight was the toughest part of the run for me.  I am fairly certain that it was extra-long! 😉

Once we got to the nine mile-marker, it felt like we were almost done.  The excitement was palpable.  And just as I started to feel as though we were gonna do it, the man appeared on the sidelines and caught this snap (I was in the middle of saying ‘BABE!’). I have to admit, I nearly cried from joy for nearly being done, and for seeing him so surprisingly.  It was incredible.

Of our team (of three, because Minda wasn’t able to run), Noelle & I both had never run any sort of organized race in our lives.  Dave did a great job of helping us keep on pace and stay motivated.  We laughed from the minute we got into the car to drive down until the race started.  We were a bundle of nerves, and then it started, and even though it was scary and intimidating, we just put one foot in front of the other.

I had three goals.  To finish, to run the whole time, and to do it under two hours.  We accomplished all three.  It was such an overwhelming exciting feeling.

We’re going to do a half marathon in September.  Training starts … um, in a few days!  My legs need a little bit of a recovery.  But I know that when training does start, Lucy will be ready to help her mama train.  And the man, who has been so incredibly supportive and helpful through all of it, will be there with me again.  I have a great family ~ I’m a lucky girl.

 

the day before

As the man said this morning as I worked myself into a panic, there isn’t much that can be done the day before that hasn’t already been done.

So we enjoyed a leisurely day, including lunch at the Four Dogs Tavern ~ where Lucy Lou got to join us on the patio!

Some of the things we noshed ~

It was great to enjoy the day, and now, it’s bed time.  Tomorrow is approaching fast, and no amount of procrastination is going to make the run come slower.  It’s now or never, do or die!

Next time I blog, hopefully, I can say I just completed a 10 mile run!

if I had a million dollars

This will be short, but sweet.  The man and I have been indulging in ‘what if’s’ recently, and I thought I’d share a few with you. Mostly, we think about ‘what if’ I had a million dollars ….

Here are our top thoughts.

1.  The man wants a bike.  Like, a real, grrrr, man bike.  And he has a buddy to go riding with, so we look at a lot of bikes, “just for fun.”

2. I would like to travel to the next few places, in no particular order …

Burgundy, France

Banff, Canada

Malaysia

Edinburgh, Scotland (yes, I know I’ve been there, but I really want to go with John!)

I know this list probably seems a little skimpy (if you know me at all) but it’s what’s on my mind right.now.this.minute. In fact, I really really really really really really really want to go to France.

The cheese.

The bread.

The gorgeous-ness.

The, the, well, the French-ness.

HGTV.  It’s a dangerous thing.  I’m off to check flights to la belle Francais.